I talked to the Chan Buddhist Abbot today.

I asked him for a job.

I told him I wasn't sure where I supposed to be.

Their headquarters for the American sector of the Chinese Chan (Zen) Buddhists is in Hawaii.

They'd offered me a position / ordination a dozen years ago. Now, they are concerned about my "attachments." They've been keeping track of me, thanks to the internet. They know I don't want to give up my music career.

But I would get to go to Hawaii...

Much to my surprise, they knew about my "Masonic Kung Fu."

Oh yeah, the Grand Secretary of the California Freemasons sent a letter to the Grand Secretary of Chinese Freemasons asking him to supply me information and Masonic contacts to help me research my "Masonic Kung Fu."

I don't think the official Buddhist churches want me anymore. I have too many "irons in the fire."

Too late. I already shaved my head.

I started telling jokes about my bald head--before everyone else does:

"Caitlin," I said, "follow me." Caitlin covered her eyes as if looking into the sun, "I can't. You're blinding me."

"Caitlin," I said to my daughter, "I was walking down the street at night and I asked the deer why it was frozen in the road." The deer said, "I thought you were a motorcycle."

I told several other jokes a few minutes ago. I enjoy making my daughter laugh. "Everyone seemed to be happy everytime I cut my hair shorter this past week. But now I've run out of 'happy.'" "What happened?" Caitlin asked, genuinely concerned. "I ran out of hair."

The last time I shaved my head was in 1997. It feels cool to rub my noggen. Hey, maybe if I make a wish...

What a wild week this has been. I went from Hippy Coyote to Yippy Chihuahua. Now I'm Mr. Clean.

April 11 , 2010

Love and best wishes,
Buddha Z