Month: February 2021
YouTube Video TRANSCRIPT: Daily Taoist 47
Alright. I’m gonna do one for of these before I take a break and have lunch… Get these done.
I need to get all these done right now and then I’ll be able to release them on a regular basis. But I’ve gotta. Unfortunately, I got messed up and backed up and coverered up one of my classes. I lost a class. I can fix my mistakes. But I made a mistake. i can fix it and know what to do. And I’m gonna fix it by finishing this project: I’m gonna go all the way to the end of the book.
So if you’re here. Feel good that I’m going to go all the way to the end. [laughs] Here we go.
Proper performance of any task is obvious by the lack of need to repeat the task.
See? And that’s why me as a musician I always try to record it–I mean I could sloppily record and then say, “I’ll fix it up some day.” But that’ll never happen. Especially for me. So I’ve got to make everything good the first time. Leave it and then know it’s good. Same with my books. And there might be a typo or something in it. But I get them as good as I can. Feel good about it, and then I’ve gotta move on. I’ve actually found I think three typos in this book already. “AHHHH.” [laughs]
Okay. Here we go.#27: Yeah, this is a good one. Proper performance– (They’re all good. Learn every one of these here because they’re worthy of consideration.) [sigh]
Daily Taoist here. Let’s blast!
Proper performance of any task is obvious by the lack of need to repeat the task. Each person’s methods are recognized by the balanced observer to be correct and efficient in terms of the path or way of the individual.
Ooh. There’s a few cool words in there. Alfright. So… You ready? Last sentence.
An unbalanced person can learn from the successes of balanced persons. And a balanced person can learn from the mistakes of an unbalanced person.
Yeah. That’s kind of my friend Oscar. He tried so hard to help me. But he was out of balance–and it was just nice to have a friend. A friend is someone– My definition of a friend is: someone who is trying to improve your life.
My definition of love: is somehe sone who is working to improve your life. Love and friendship. Almost the same. Love just seems a little more committed. Friend’s just one step away. But that’s it. If they’re not trying to improve your life they’re not your friend. You’ve got lots of acquaintances. You can know a thousand people who think you’re wonderful. Say nice things. they’ll take you out to dinner. Send you Christmas presents. They’re not your friend and they’re not your lovers. Or someone that loves you. If they loved you they’d make sure that something improves in your life. They could not leave you just like that. Like a field. Like a plantation. If you love those plants, you’re not gonna just say, “Oh they look nice.” And then come back a year later. You have to water them and take care of them. Love requires effort. That used to be one of my slogans. It’s in a couple of poems I’ve written. I’m trying to teach people that LOVE is not a word. In fact that’s tht name of the poem I think, “Love Is Not A Word.” Love is effort. If somebody’s not putting effort into making your life better–then they’re not giving you any love. And they do not love you.
Alright. Here we go.
Are you generally satisfied with the work you do?
Yeah. Oh, I’m sorry. I’m not supposed to answer for you. [laughs]
Are you generally satisfied with your work that you do?
Explain your work standards of excellence.
Ah. You see now, that’s what defines sometimes– That’s why it’s so important to differentiate between the WOMAN soul and the WORKER soul. The WORKER soul is willing to accept whatever you say are the terms of excellence. But a WOMAN’s only going to agree to what she’s gonna agree to and that’s it. You can’t force her to agree to something she doesn’t want to agree to. A WORKER will agree to whatever you say. Whatever your terms are. Okay? Your standards of excellence.
You want that shiny? He’ll make it shiny. A WOMAN soul’s gonna say, “Ah that’s shiny enough.” Okay.
How do your standards relate to your goals? So, your standards of excellence and your goals.
If people judge you by your work–what is their judgement of you?
So when people see you. Let’s say you’re a cashier, in the store. And they see you. What’s their judgement of you as a worker? And, as a person? I
If people judge you by your work–what is their judgement of you?
What do they think of you based on the way you handle the cash register?
There’s a wide variety of people there, in terms of… Check that out. Rate people. Judge them. Then try to figure what the quality of their life is. And what they’re like when they’re not working. Based on what they’re like when they’re working.
What are you artistic standards of excellence?
Artistic standards of excellence???
I think I’m trying too hard for you guys. Well, remember I wrote this for my Kung Fu students. So yes, they’re supposed to have artistic standards of excellence. They’re doing Kung Fu. I forgot. [laughs] This was actually written remember for my Kung Fu students. So when i wrote this I was writing for a certain type of audience. Not everybody. This probably doesn’t interest most people. Most people don’t care about their standards of excellence. I thisepnk right there I just [SNIP SNIP] I just separated off about 50% of the planet. 50% of the planet does not operate on standards of excellence. It’s just meeting your standards enough to get paid and that’s it.
They don’t operate under any particular standards other than whatever it takes to get paid. Okay? So that’s half the population. So that’s why this book probably only has a limited audience. Okay.
How do your work standards– WELL ACTUALLY I WANT EVERYBODY TO READ IT THOUGH. Remember, if I’m gonna stop wars–I’ll make some other books that are easier. I have hope for them. You tell me hard this book is.
How do your work stands relate to your goals?
So in other words, you’ve got these standards of excellence and how does that relate to any of your other goals?
Obviously, they should all tie together. That’s what we’re working to: is to tie all this together. But sometimes we’re fractionalized. Sometimes you just know how to be a good student and you don’t know how to be a good worker–that doesn’t make sense. They’re both the same. So we’ve got to make everything fit together–and then you’re in harmony and then you can be as successful as you can be. e
How do you determine the quality of your work? In other words, usually your parents–or your father determines your standards of quality. In the Confucian family the Father tells the Mother that these are his rules. And then the Mother exacts those rules and plays the rule. So the Mother is the enforcer and the Dad is the legislator. He’s like the Senator: he makes the rules. And then Mom, she is the school teacher who teaches the kids and like I said… it’s that triumvirate, that pyramid.
Let’s see. How reluctant are you to repeat a job if it’s okay–not great.
Boy, that’s one I bump into every day. So many times. So many times I hit that… and sometimes I just have to say: And there’s a slogan I use. And I still use it. Still echoes in my head. Maybe it will help you. “A JOB WORTH DOING ONCE IS WORTH DOING TWICE.” That echoes in my head… so many times. I’ll look at it and go, “Oh…. If it’s worth doing once–I’ll do it twice.” In fact that happened with my bed. When I got it out and I was trying to find a leak. My airbed. And I couldn’t. And I put it in there and it still leaked… And it’s like, “AHHHHHH.” I wanted to pretend it’s okay, but it wasn’t. There was still a leak. So I thought, “It’s worth doing twice.”
So I took all the covers off, took out here in the living room. Soaked it down where I had more room to work around it. Found two more holes. [laughs] But there’s still another hole. I’ve gotta do it again.
Alright. Here we go.
Does it seem that life repeats its hardships?
Is that a perspective? I’ll have to evaluate the question more.
Does life seem to repeat its hardships
Does it seem impossible to get ahead?
Whew! Living on the street for six years… it almost seemed impossible… but look. I’m here. But I had to develop an alternate strategy. Couldn’t figure out how to make money. Couldn’t do it through fundraisers. And I couldn’t do it through family. I couldn’t do it through friends. I couldn’t do it through selling books. I couldn’t do it through selling Kung Fu classes. I couldn’t do it through selling music. I couldn’t do it through performing. I couldn’t–I mean I tried everything I could to make some money but I couldn’t do it. And so finally I had to play the system. I had to play the long game and I had to get Section 8. And I was hospitalized. And i did that. I was in Martin Luther King for sixe months. And then I was in a homeless shelter for a year. Man, I had to play a long game to end up in this situation where I’m settled. This is not the way I wanted to do it though. I tried to just my money. My thing. But I had to form an alternate strategy and play the system.
Where were we?
What slows down the progress of your dreams?
Not haveing family support. No money. If I had money I might–I’d-I’d… SHEESH! [laughs] I’m like thirty years behind in all my projects. Because I don’t have enough money to finiwh them and do everything I want with the projects I started thirty years ago. I’d just reach a dead end because I couldn’t put any money into them.
But yeah. So money is my big impediment. I don’t have family. Family won’t give me money. No friends. No sales. No fans. No customers. [SIGH] That’s why I say. I don’t know if I want to come back to this world for another life. This is just too frustrating. It’s just not really– I could’ve accomplished so much more.
I’m actually– Should I tell you? Ah, Ill tell you. What the heck. I’v actually–the Vedic Scriptures– I kind of got goose bumps the other day when I realized I’d already figured out the answer to my problems. In the Vedic Scriptures they talk about different Heavens. Different afterlifes. Different worlds your soul can live on. And I think that what it is I just got on the wrong planet. I’m on the cow planet. And i”ve really got to find an art planet. Find a place where there’s creative thinkers, and artistic thinkers, and scientists. ANd that’s the planet I need to be on.. This is a terrible planet to be on if you’re an artist. Absolutely the worst planet to be on. Your own family! I’m disowned and disinherited by my own mother because I’m an artist. So you don’t want to be on this planet. Earth is a horrible planet to be on.
So if I am gonna have another life–and I don’t want to just give up–Maybe I should just be a ghost forever. Maybe that’d be more fun. If I am gonna be alive again it’s gonna have to be on another planet. Because this planet sucks! It really sucks.
Okay. Where are we? And that’s fine. You know. All the cows are as happy as they can be. [laughs] And I’m not trying to say, “Ah you cows! It’s your fault!” No. It’s my fault. I came here and decided to live with a bunch of cows. That was MY mistake.
Okay. But I’m learning. I’m getting smarter. I’m getting smarter see? I’m getting my new strategy. My next strategy is: get a better planet to live on.
Do you really seek advice, or prefer to do it yourself?
I’M ALWAYS LOOKING FOR ADVICE! Like Oscar. He couldn’t even give me good advice. But I was still asking questions. We would argue. But even when he was giving me bad advice– I could at least–like–argue with him. It was good–that way I was kinda still figure out what the advice was. Poor Oscar. He tried so hard to help me. But he couldn’t. He was–just not equipped. [laughs] He didn’t ahve what he needed to help me. And I think that broke his heart when he realized that.
He was always my friend to the end though. Yeah, I’ve gotta give him that. He was my friend.
How do you enjoy helping other people do better?
Hey, my picture froze [camera image freezes].
Alright. It looks like we’re jammed up. Ooop my picture froze. I’m gonna have to quit. Maybe I ran out of memory.
Do you enjoy reading autobiographies of successful persons and do you enjoy reading ‘how-to’ books?
The counter’s rolling. I’m gonna quit here. And this was #27 of the TAO OF TAOISM, which says, that proper performance of any task is obvious by the lack of need to repeat the task.
YouTube Video TRANSCRIPT: Daily Taoist 46 Tao #25
Alright. Welcome back to the Daily Tao. Buddha Zhen here. And I’m on NUMBER 25. And this is a big one.
And… I also… I think I improved my lighting. I did atsomething up there. Washed my face. Pinched a little bit. Hopefully it doesn’t look like I got stung by a bee. [laughs] And combed my hair. So, anyway… Those are my efforts– In other words… Remember we talked about the self-discipline? That’s my self-discipline is that little extra effort to look nice and everything. A lot of people just spend all their time looking nice. But they’re not doing anything for themselves on the inside. But, you know, I need to spend a little more work on the outside.
I’m not faulting anybody. We’ve just got to see where our balance is and see if we want to shift it.
Okay, if I was an actor I’d need to spend a lot more time on the outside than the inside.
Okay. Here we go. Each per– Well, that’s what I’m trying to change. I’m trying to help actors be a lot more that tools.
Each person can exemplify the ultimate powers of Nature by intelligent and natural actions.
That’s only the first sentence. There’s a whole bunch. Let’s read that one sentence again because that’s important. So in other words that’s saying if you’re smart and natural, that’s better than being stupid and unnatural. Right? Why when I say things like that do I picture Mr. Trump?
each person can exemplify the ultimate powers of Nature by intelligent and natural actions.
As each goal is planned, initiated, incorporates ideals, and is completed: so are the seasons of life imitated.
I’m gonna read that one sentence again.
As each goal is planned, initiated, incorporates ideals, and is completed: — (That’s the four seasons there.) –so are the seasons of life imitated.
Intelligent goals must be natural and within Nature’s patterns so that the ultimate powers can be utilized and harmonized with. Not opposed. In this way goals that are also Nature’s goals are natural goals that enhance life.
Wow! There’s a lot there but, kind of simple thoancugh. It’s basically saying that you can develop your life to have goals, processes, and beginnings and endings that… kind of flow like Nature. And you and yourself are a natural Nature. You have your own Tao. The Tao has its Tao. And now your Tao and the Bigger Tao are in harmony with each other. And so now you’re kind of–It’s kind of like swimming. Swimming in water. Okay?
So, here we go. Real fast. This is two pages long so let’s see what i can do. Um, this has got a lot of blanks to fill-in so this may go really fast.
List your current goals in terms of the four seasons of Nature.
So first of all, come up with all your goals. Now figure out how they fit into the seasons of Nature. Which ones–you know… Where are they at? Are they at their Autumn? Are they dying? Are they old, and something you did ten years ago? Or is it the winter: Is it something you’re planning but it’s not ready because you don’t have resources like the sunlight? Is it the spring? Where now you’ve got everything together and you’re really putting all your effort into making it happen? Or is it the summer when everything’s flowing along and you’re starting to pump the product out and building the business? See?
So you’ve got these seasons you can work with.
So you want to take your goals and then start looking at them in terms of how they fit into a seasonal structure.
So let me go along. Because, like I said, I broke this down into the four seasons. ANd then I gave you some kind of clues for the four seasons to help you understand them a little better.
So in this case, AUTUMN. So I’m summarizing this because remember our goal is to figure out how to make this work for us. In our lives. So that’s why I’m kind of superimposing these human concepts on this book.
AUTUMN: Clean up and prepare for the future, fertilize and planning.
Okay. So once again. The… goals that are at this stage of the operation. Which are your AUTUMN GOALS. You’re cleaning them up. You’re preparing them for the future. You’re fertilizing them. Maybe… they’re like I said, might be dead stuff. So you’ve gotta fertilize them. And you’re in your planning phase.
Okay. So you’re in kind of a [SCRUNCH] mulch situation.
Okay. So what are the goals? You list them out. And then you put down–you’ve got a column to put down these goals.
The IDEALS that are incorporated. So if one of your goals has the of maybe pleasing your wife. That’s the whole reason you’re doing it.
Maybe another one is because it satisfies this long term thing you wannted to do since you were a little kid.
Maybe this other one is because you’ve–you’re doing it for somebody else. And when you’re done they’re gonna pay you a whole bunch of money. [laughs]
Your ideals. We’ve got to be more idealistic.
As one of your ideals–how does it satisfy your ideals… Your Nature… as far as being a better person?
“Well this is going to improve my ability to do this. Or maybe it’s gonna make me understand this better.”
I don’t know. Try to put some ideals in there. I’ll have to think about that more myself.
Okay. And then it’s got tow other columns. So you’ve go the goal. What IDEALS are incorporate in this goal? Like for me it might be philosophy, or Buddhism, or something like that. You might have something specific in there.
Now, then there’s two more lines. The first– It says, “FIRST STEP.” Inotherwords, what’s your next step? What’s the thing you’ve gotta do? And what’s your OVERALL STRATEGY? Gave you a teeny little line to do it. But what’s your Strategy? “Oh, I’m gonna do this and then… (your Strategy)… then I’ll do this and this.
Okay. You’ve got four goals and you do all that.
NExt one is WINTER GOALS. This is where you’re organizing and PROTECTING. And you’re establishing TERRITORIES and BOUNDARIES. In the case of a farmer you’d be laying out your fields and this is where you’d be deciding where to put the crops and everything. So you’re establishing– you’re building the future. You’re building the house. You’re gonna build a business. The first thing you’ve got to build is build the building.
Okay? So what are your goals?
What are the IDEALS incorporated in those goals? The ideals. Once again we can expand on this. I’ll give that more thought too.
And the our FIRST STEP in your STRATEGY. So each of these goals: SEE what the next big steps are. I not only made you just put it out there: I made you think, “What should I really be– Where am I GOING NEXT?” Okay?
SPRING: Your Spring goals. This is where you’re planting the seeds. ANd you’re beginning to work on your project on a daily basis. You’re out ther tending the field. You’re watering and you’re pulling the weeds. Now you’re working specifically. If you’re like me as a musician this is where you’re recording in the studio. Editing and overdubbing, mixing… and all this type stuff. So this would be the Spring. This is the Springtime. The CREATION of the product.
Then comes SUMMER. That’s when you harvest and sell. You complete your projects and you end the work. In the case of the record you package it up and sell it up BOOM and start the advertising and go on tour or go to thenext record. So in your case, if you’ve got your IDEALS, your FIRST STEP, and your STRATEGY… But your SUMMER? What things are you finishing right now? What’s this thing you’ve been working on? The car in your garage you’ve been working on. So it’s done… That’s done… You’re in your SUMMER. Okay?
So here’s some questions to ask to illuminate all of this stuff. But this is for you. I want you to make this work for you. You lay out your goals. You kind of try to figure this out. You sort it out and in the process you’re going to learn something. You’re gonna see something. Or… You can’t know everything. [laughs] Or you wouldn’t be here. [laughs] You’re gonna lay it out. See if you can’t learn something from your own stuff. Okay. Here’s what–
How do all your goals fit together and what is their combined result? What’s an overall perspective if Iwas to look and this and say, “Okay. What does it look like this guy’s trying to do?”
How does this combine result of your goals fit on YOUR PATH?
How does this COMBINED RESULT fit on your path?
How to define your path. I don’t think we’ve talked about that enough.
But anyway YOUR PATH and that’s gonna change and should always change. But from where you can see i tright now, this section of your path: Wher you are goinhg.
Hopefully you are on the right path.
Which goals do not really fit on your life path? And why?
It’s not like you have time for everything, but you better come up with a better excuse than that. Because everybody has a limited amount of time. So you’ve gotta figure out what–Why is that not deserved? (For you to put time into it?)
Okay. So putting everything in perspective there.
Lastly: List your methods and techniques for planning the strategies of each goal listed above.
Ahh. So if you do look at all those things–How do you determine–What’s your strategy for getting anything done? Okay? Alright! Probably didn’t say anything. Probably didn’t think of anything. Probably when, “I dunno.”
But you’ve got to get a list. Get a list. Get a “TO DO LIST” for every single project you’re doing.
So if your project is to…even mow the lawn once a wekk on Saturday: Put up a list on the month whatever– and– You can do this so many different ways… But anyway you’ve got your Satufday mowing list. Well, I wouldn’t make a list just for my mowing, but on the calendar–You just go ahead and on every–Allthrough your calendar you WRITE, “MOW THE LAWN.” on every Saturday of your calendar. And then as you come to that you say, “Ah, yeah, I’ve gotta mow the lawn today.” (or thenext day — before…) You say, “Oh yeah, I’m gonna mow the lawn tomorrow.” You see? So that helps you get it done.
So there’s all kinds of methods and tecchniques you you use to make your strategies happen. Planning and “To Do Lists,” “Goal Lists,” updating your “Weekly List,” calendars… These are all important things.
.So just look at life as one of those things you’re going to always kind of– you’re revitalizing. Well that’s why we’re here. We’re looking at it fromlots of different ways. Okay?
Here we go. Did I make it? Eleven minutes….
Okay. Tao of Taoism. I’ve got time to read the beinning again. This is a tough one. A big one.
This is #25 of TAO OF TAOISM. Actually, my verson of it. The Tao of Taoism.
Here we go.
Each person can exemplify the ultimate powers of Nature by intelligent and natural actions.
(I’d sure lie to think Nature is intelligent and natural.) [laughs]
As each goal is planned, initiated, incorporates ideals– (That’s the part we need to work on.) –and is completed: so are the seasons of life imitated.
Intelligent goals must be natural and within Natures patterns so that the ultimate powers can be utilized and harmonized with. Not opposed.
In this way: goals that are also Nature’s goals– (You know Nature might want you to have that farm. Saying, “Yeah. Go ahead and have that farm and feed all those people. That’s a good idea!) –This way, goals that are also Nature’s goals are natural goals that enhance life.
Yeah! So let’s all enhance life. Let’s all be individuals, personally driven. Have our own ambitions. Have our own desires, our own likes, our own wants. But still all harmonize and work together.
Alright. Buddha Zhen here, saying the world can be a nice place. Just need to have nice people in it. Nice people are in harmony with The Tao.
YouTube Video s eTRANSCRIPT: Daily Taoist 45
Oh yeah. My formatting. I’m realizing what I want to do is read THE TAO at the end of it as well. So when we’re done at the end, I’m usually in a hurry, I’ll try to read THE TAO again so we can kind of see where we were coming from.
The last one was harmonizing our desires with Nature. And our own inner Nature.
Actions equal your Nature.
I’ve got a song about this. But let’s just read on.
Intelligent actions equal an intelligent Nature.
Did I write that to compliment myself? [laughs] The rewards of actions are Natural events.
Rewards of actions… Ahhhh. See…. BING. A little light bulb went off. Because I’m looking for rewards… finance… sell… sales or something. But I can’t find that Natural event. That’s why I’m saying, “Do I get out of Patreon?” I was hoping Patreon would be a Natural event. That would help me market and find people who would appreciate and support me. But it was not the Natural event I guess I’m looking for. I don’t know. I’m lost. I’m lost on this planet. That’s why I don’t want to come back. There’s not a Natural event for me as an artist. Or a creative thinker… Or a philosopher… I can’t find the Natural events for me to tap into. To get sustanence or provide nourishment for other people. I can’t tap into that. I’m just like a lone wolf out here all by myself with nobody to talk to.
So the Natural events for me to grow and share with you– I haven’t figured that out yet. That’s why I’m trying YouTube and my websites. Is that my Natural event?
Here we go.
Goals are attained through Natural behavior.
Well, I don’t force myself to do this. In fact actually I have to force myself NOT to do stuff… to be a creative person. Because I’ve got so much other stuff to do.
So my Natural behavior though is to always tend back to creating the art and spending less time doing the other things I might want to do.
Trusting Nature, The Tao, is trusting one’s own actions.
Yes, I’ve come to harmonize with the fact I’m a creative person. I accept the fact that I have these needs and desires and abilities that need to be–just utilized. Just be who I am. So I’ve known that ever since I was a teenager. And that nobody else can see it. That’s–I could never figure that out. So hurtful… that people couldn’t see my Nature. Which I’ve had ever since I was a teenager.
My own mother, she sent me a card. Might have had a check in it. I’ve gotten two checks from my mom in the last two years. I think my relatives pressured her because the know I’ve been kicked out and my mother didn’t give me anything. She’s a millionaire. And I’m homeless. Anyway, so… but one of those things she gave me–she gave me a card. There was two. I kept them both. They’re very very confusing. I showed them to my friends and my friends went, “Wow. That’s weird.” But one of the card… well– [laughs] It says, “I hope you find your dreams.”
It’s like, I found my dreams FIFTY YEARS AGO. I’ve just been playing with them and working and creating them ever since. But because my mother never saw it as a money pot–in other words, the dream is always at the other end of the rainbow. And when you actually find your rainbow that’s your dream it always comes with the pot of gold. See? So my mom married her, my evil stepfather who passed away last year and left me nothing so I could stay homeless. He was evil. [laughs] he was a horrible person. That was my stepfather. Anyway he– I don’t really want to got there. But I had a reason for going here. But um… Yes, so anyway.
Where were we. Anyway. She said– She couldn’t– “I hope you find your dream.” I found my dreams, but my parents refused to accept that you’re allowed to have dreams. You’re not allowed– They call me “A Dreamer.” And they think it’s wrong to be a dreamer. It’s a sin to be a dreamer. In fact that’s one of the reasons my mom disowned me. She said I’m “A Dreamer.” That wouldn’t work. “Just get a job like everybody else.” She thinks it’s wrong to support dreamers. So she took me out of her “WILL” so she wouldn’t support a dreamer. That was her motivation.
Okay. Here we go.
Describe your personality.
Well, I’d like you to describe it. [laughs] It’s changed though. I wasn’t so comical. You look at pictures of me as a kid. I was like this robot I was like Data [from Star Trek]. No emotion. No smile. I look at those pictures like– That’s why I’d like for some people to tell me what I was like. I had my own perspective. I was just being me. But when I look at those pictures I think, “Man, that’s a pretty–” I don’t know. I wasn’t sour but, I definitely wasn’t as jovial as happy as I was– as now. So my personality has changed you know to what it is now. And having kids made me able to just make a mockery of myself. Once you have kids, you lose all your ego. Your self-esteem. [laughs] No, not all of it. You know, you…basically… you have to just– When you become a Mr. Mom. You have to get down into that world.
Which is also what destroyed my reputation with my kids, in terms of Taoism [Confucianism]. Which is okay, but in Taoism [Confucianism] the father is ‘grave’ at home. I was like, “What?” That was one of my favorite translations of that. But it always bothered me the most. So it took me fifteen years–or ten years to figure it out. Father is ‘grave’ at home. “What?” “What is that supposed to mean?” Well, what it means is when Father goes home and he starts playing with the kids–they’re never going to take him seriously. He’s just like the neighbor father. He’s like the other kid. Or he’s like mom. Or he’s like big brother. He’s not special anymore. So when the Father comes home–what they mean by ‘grave’ is he’s always acting like he’s in a funeral. He has his whole other world of friends, socializing, and business, and partying. He doesn’t take the kids. So he’s got a whole other social world. So when he comes home to his children–in Confucian society he’s a King. And his children treat him with respect. Sure he can go play. But he plays seriously. He’s a teacher. You treat this person like a college professor.
See, I didn’t have that with my kids. So my kids will never have that kind of respect for me. They see me as just the daycare worker. [laughs]
Okay. Where were we? It’s six minutes. Let’s see:
Describe your personality. You describe yours. Describe mine while you’re at it. I’d love to hear what you say.
Describe your spiritual character.
Oh man, has that changed over the years too. Remember? I was a Catholic. And I was an Atheist. And then I became a Buddhist. And then I became a Native American Pipe Carrier. Then I became a Taoist. And then, oh yeah, I studied the Muslim religion. I won’t call myself a Muslim but I’ve read their Quoran twice… And I was friends. They used to always invite me the Temple. I’ve hung out with Muslims. But I decided I didn’t want to join. I’m trying not be part– Even the Chan Buddhists, there’s a couple of sects of Zen Buddhism that have tried to claim me. And it’s like, “No, no, no, no, no. I’ll just go ahead and be independent.”
Nobody’s really helping me get to where I am and nobody’s network has really got what I need to go forward. I’m just better… being who I am and carving my path. It’s all coming together. My Tao is coming together. Creating my Nature. I’m creating my environment–my world.
Describe your student, employee attitudes and quality.
As a student and employee. As a subservient person.
I am so obedient. I am just digustingly obedient. I shouldn’t say it like that because it’s my success. If you hire me you get the best. You get the best worker. If I’m not the best worker I’d be shocked. I’m always in the top 10% or less. I mean I always want to be a good worker. My upbringing. That’s the one thing my parents taught me is how to be a great slave. I come from the Pennsylvania Dutch and they believe in the work ethic. “You work hard. Serve God.” To serve God. I mean, that’s how they drill it into you. You’re serving God by slaving. [laughs] So I come from that. So I’m a great slave. And I work very very hard all day long and I don’t complain. And I worker harder– In fact, most people say, “Slow down. You’re making us look bad.” You know. So… And as astudent–
“Hello Buddy” [to cat] “Wanna come up here?”
As a student I also– I am a very very good student. Always at the top of the class. The teacher’s pet . When I was at UCLA I was hired by several of my teachers. My teachers hired me and I went out in commercials and music videos. I was such a good student they could tell I was a good worker. And… in one of my– in fact the reason I got on Cinesong, I was hired for Cinesong was I — Kevin Dole. Where are you Kevin Dole? I love you. You’re a great guy. I worked for you for a couple years. For a year anyway. One of my students, fellow students at UCLA had to go to a doctor appointment. She goes, “I’ve gotta work on a music video tomorrow for REO Speedwagon.” She goes, “If you’ll take my place on the video–I still want to take the paycheck but you’ll get the experience of working on a music video if you’ll work for free.” “Okay. I’ll do that.”
On that REO Speedwagon video, it was the first one they did. Can’t think of the name of it but I can picture it though. And in fact I even saw it on YouTube this year. But anyway, that music video. In fact, I think I looked up all of them I did last year. Buy anyway, the… I did so well– Ane one of the things I did, being a guy. Anyway, being a worker as opposed to a woman is that I kept sweeping and cleaning… and I kept asking them if the wanted coffee. And they ended up hiring me and working there for a year or so. ANd they told me later. They said that the reason they hired me was because I was just so unoffended to just go get a cup of coffee and do mundane things that evidently other people would go, “Tsk… Really? You want me to do that?” [laughs] I was like, “Sure! You want a cup of coffee?” So that kind of enthusiasm got me that job and got me to make all kinds of commercials. And from there, we were working at Apogee. And Apogee saw me and they liked me and they said, “Hey. We’ll hire you too. We like you. You’re a good worker.” I was a Production Assistant on all kinds of movies and lie, “Spaceballs” “The Unholy”… all these movies and i was just working in the production. I was a Production Assistant. So I’m not even in the movie credits. I didn’t care. I was a student at UCLA. I was actually going to night school and doing these music videos… Like I said I met her at night school.
So.. but, by being a great employee–that actually changed my life.
Where are we? My cat’s right in the middle of my book. “Hi buddy.” [to cat] “I can’t see the page because you’re on my work.”
Here we go. Let me move it over a little bit. “Let’s share this book with me?”
Describe your leadership qualities and skills.
Ah. Now that’s very important. Now remember, most people are WOMEN – WORKERS. They’re employees. And an employee is not a leader. He’s a follower. So you’ve gotta remember 80% of our population is followers. Okay? But! Half of those people have to leaders to lead the other followers. So we’ve gotta train the followers to be leaders. Okay so…just letting you know you may not have the–you may not realize the whole picdture here.
Okay. Here we go.
Describe your romantic relationship qualities. Okay?
I don’t know what I have now. I mean I want to be romantic. I remember during the seventies or in the eighties if I went three weeks without sex it was like, “Wow! There’s something wrong with me. What’s wrong with me?” And then I remember when started to become more relationship oriented in the eighties, I thought to myself, “Wow! I haven’t been in a relationship for three months.” I remember those two things happening once. So I was in so many relationships and things. But I was in them for the wrong reason. I was in the relationship for the sake of being in a relationship.I wasn’t in the relationship because it was going to benefit my future, my career, of all these things. I wasn’t opportunistic and greedy as I should’ve. As a rseesult i had great sex, and love and whatever… but who cares? It’s all gone now. If I could do it over I would rather have chose more wisely. [laughs] Rather than– I’d arather go for quality than quantity. I didn’t get the quality.
So my relationship qualities were then were just– I was a stud. I mean, I could score really easy. And I’m not saying that to be macho or anything. It was just– It’s a shame. It was kind of a shame. It got too easy. And a lot of girls would like hit on meand say, “You wanna have sex?” And say, “Well okay.” [laughs] It was a different world back then. One night stands were a normal thing.
Okay. Where were we. Not for me. I still always at my most rambunctious I was still looking for a relationship. Always. I can difinitely say that. I was always looking for a relationship.
Describe your family attitudes.
Ah. I had incredible family attitudes for a while. I thought I came from a better family than I did. When I tried to cdreate my family. Iwas trying to create a little entertainment complex. You know. So, I was totally wrong. I was totally screwed up. My family concepts. Hopefully yours are better.
What are your insecurites?
What are your fears?
Explain your pride.
Do you make mistakes and why?
Do you trust other people most of the time?
How are you helping other people attain their goals?
And sum up your Nature.
And lastly, people in the homeless industry do not help people get out of it. They don’t help them with goals. Nobody helps people with goals. That’s the most important thing we have to do in the world. That’s what I’m trying to do is: I’m trying to help you have goals and attain them. That’s really really important.